Kid Problems
by AtlantisCat101
Summary: Nessie and Jacob go hunting together, and when they come back, they’re in for a big, big, surprise. Will they ever undo this new vampire's power?
1. Chapter 1

Summary:

Nessie and Jacob go hunting together, and when they come back, they're in for a big, big, surprise. Could this new vampire's power possibly be what they think?

There is no swearing or anything in this story. Just a couple stupids. :D

Ness POV

"Jacob, stop! You're making me laugh!!! We have to get home. Mom and Dad are going to start worrying!" I couldn't help myself. I kept on rolling on the dirt, feeling as though my sides would split open.

"Fine, fine. We'll go." He pulled himself from the ground and offered me his hand. I took it, still smiling

.

As we walked hand in hand back home, I thought of my good fortune. I had Jacob, and my amazing family. There was nothing that could tear us apart.

**Okay, that was just the beginning! More up soon.**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 of Kid Problems

**Throughout the whole story please remember- All characters except Lorraine are Stephanie Meyer's**

**Enjoy**

Ness POV

We were almost at the house when I stopped. It was like I walked into a wall. The scent of a vampire I didn't know hit me and I stopped cold. Jacob looked at me, alarmed, and then his face twisted up as he smelled it too.

My head shot toward a tree when I heard noise.

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to scare you." I yelped and saw a beautiful girl walk out of the forest. No doubt a vampire. But she couldn't have been more than 14. Even I looked older than that; 17.

She walked toward us and I felt Jacob tense beside me.

"I'm Lorraine. Lorraine Moone. I was just passing through town."

My eyes strayed to hers. I stiffened as I saw they were a striking teal. Lorraine saw me looking. "I feed on the blood of water animals. Not humans, or land animals." She looked at me questioningly. "What are you? You smell...not like a vampire or human, really. But you look like a vampire besides your eyes."

"My name is Renesmee Cullen. And I'm not a full vampire. My mother was human when she had me and my dad was a vampire. I have my mother's eyes and I drink animal blood."

"Oh, but-"

"I'm really sorry, but my family is expecting us. We have to get home."

I thought I saw her smirk, but I must have been seeing things.

She nodded. "Of course. I won't be keeping you from your family."

She walked off into the darkness.

Jacob spoke for the first time. "I don't like her. I'll be keeping an extra watch round here."

"But, Jake," I said. "She told us she was leaving."

He glanced at me sideways. "I don't trust her."

I sighed and we continued walking. Then I saw my house emerge in a clearing and I ran, pulling Jacob, hoping my parents wouldn't be too mad.

**The end of the second chapter! I promise you, the next ones will be longer.**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 of Kid Problems

**This is my first published fanfic. I hope you like it. All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer, I only own Lorraine.**

I hopped up the steps and opened the door. I was surprised to see an 8 year old boy that looked strangely like Emmett staring at me.

"Um, excuse me? Who are you?" I asked, leaning down to his level.

"I'm EMMETT I tell you EMMETT. EMMETT CULLEN. DO YOU NOT RECOGNIZE ME? YOUR OWN UNCLE?" He shouted.

I took a startled step back.

"Emmett, get away from there!" Emmett was pushed away by a 13 year old boy that looked like Carlisle.

"Sorry, he's being stupid. Come in." He said. "I HEARD THAT!" Emmett shouted from somewhere in the house. "I DON'T CARE!" the blonde boy shouted back.

I pulled Jacob inside and we followed the blonde kid to the living room.

"Wait, grandpa? Grandpa Carlisle?" I asked him.

"Well, um _YEAH_." He said snobbily (I don't think that's even a word)

"Carlisle! Stop it! That's our own granddaughter!" a 15 year old girl appeared. She had caramel colored hair and I was sure she was Esme. She shooed him away. "Yeah, whatever dude." He said and snapped his gum.

"Grandma Esme? Is that you? What's going on?" I asked her dumbfounded. I glanced at Jacob. He looked like he was in shock.

"Well, I will tell you! Some strange girl came in here, said her name was Lorraine something, and then she just zapped us and we all turned into this! This!" she gestured to herself.

"Whe-Where- Where's everyone else?" I asked my grandma.

"I'll call 'em. EMMETT, CARLISLE, ALICE, JASPER, COME DOWN HERE AND BRING ROSE, EDWARD, AND BELLA TOO! NOW!" she screamed.

Soon I heard shuffling down the stairs and into the living room.

"NOW GET IN AGE ORDER!"

There was more shuffling as Carlisle stood in the front, a honey blonde hair boy behind, holding a little bronze-haired boy, then Emmett, holding a pretty little blonde, then finally a mini girl with spiky jet black hair holding a really, really little girl with chestnut hair.

The parade stopped and turned so we could get a good look at them. I heard a thud and saw Jacob passed out on the floor. I didn't give him any more thought though, and walked up to the kids.

"C-can you tell me your name, and a-age, p-p-p-lease?" I stuttered. "and maybe even what grade you would be in if you went to school?"

Carlisle looked at me strangely. "We do go to school, idiot. And I'm Carlisle Cullen, 13, and I'm in 7th grade." He blew a bubble.

Esme popped up. "You know me, I'm Esme, 15 and I am a whatever-comes-after-freshman. (**A/N: I have no clue, is it sophomore or junior?)**

The honey blonde boy walked up to me. "I am Jasper Hale, I am 9 years old and I am in 3rd grade. And this is Edward, he's two and he doesn't go to school." I gasped and looked down at the toddler that was apparently my dad.

"Mm-hmm." Emmett cleared his throat. "I am Emmett Cullen, and I am 8. I am in 2nd grade. This is Rosie. She's only 3. She stays home all day."

"Emmett and Jasper are babies." Carlisle muttered under his breath.

The pixie jumped up. "I'm Alice, I'm six. I gotta little speech pwoblem, doh, I can't say da (TH) sound o da awe (R) sound. I go to kindagawden. Dis is Bella. She's one and a half. She stays home wif Eddy and Wosie."

"Ohmygosh, what am I going to DO? Lorraine could've done that to us!" I fell to the ground on my knees and started sobbing. Esme jumped down and comforted me. "Don't worry, we'll find her again and make her put us back. In the meantime, why don't ya hire a nanny?"

"Nanny? I don't WANT a nanny! NO NANNY NO NANNY NO NANNY NO NANNY!" Emmett shouted and he got Jasper to join in chanting.

At this, Jacob woke up. "What? Nanny?"

"Jake, go find that Lorraine girl and BRING HER BACK HERE! Now!" I yelled.

Jacob scrambled up and jumped outside.

"No nanny! No nanny! No nanny!" Alice joined in the shouts and Rose, Edward and Bella were weeping on the floor.

I could tell this was going to be a long time until Jacob found Lorraine.


	4. Chapter 4

Ness POV

We lived in Alaska, but still had our old Forks house. Since it being what 150 years? or so since I was born there, we chose to go 'vacation' there. I was rather depressed since Jacob had gone ahead. I didn't want to take a car; anyway, I wanted to go on an airplane.

I decided to set about packing. One problem: I didn't have any clothes for the kids. Esme's real clothes would probably fit her, so that was good. I was becoming desperate because I didn't know what would happen if I let a bunch of kids run the house to go shopping, so that was out of the question.

Since I was just so desperate, I wandered into the attic. I was surprised I had only been up here once before; even more that I didn't remember it.

But I forgot about remembering when I came to a huge pile of boxes. I cautiously peered in one of them and was ecstatic to find kid's clothes of every size, shape, and color. Some of it was even mine from when I was a kid. That could be Alice's.

I sorted the clothes for Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, Edward, Bella (I couldn't bear to call them Mom and Dad, because of their current…state) and Rosalie. I even found some teenage girl clothes for Esme.

Then I piled the clothes up in my arms and took them downstairs.

"EVERYBODY! TEN HUT (I had heard that somewhere)! GET DOWN HERE, please!"

Everybody rushed down and Alice started squealing. "Oh, da pwetty closes! Oh, dis pile's mine!"

"Ooh, ooh this is MY pile!" shouted Jasper. "NO, it's MY pile!" shouted Emmett. "No," I said, taking the pile from them, "this is Carlisle's pile."

"Well, then THIS is my pile!" Jasper yelled. "Sure. And that's yours, Emmett." I pointed at another pile.

"Oh oh, you found ME some? Oh goody, this shirt is OMG SO CUTE!!!LOL!!" Esme said.

I brought the babies' stuff upstairs and found 3 smallish bags to pack stuff. I got all their clothes in easily and I declared the babies were ready.

"NO EMMETT!! NO!!! THAT'S _MY _SHIRT!! MINE!!! MINNNNNEEE!!!" I heard Jasper shout.

I swished down the stairs and found a crying Jasper and a mean-looking Emmett.

"Nessie! Tell Jasper that I'm his OLDER brother, he's only 7 and I'm already 8! So that automatically means I get to take his stuff! Whenever I wanna!" Emmett told me.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. No way Emmett. How would you like it if Carlisle always took your stuff? Huh?" I picked up the crying 7-year-old and held him on my hip. He put his head on my shoulder and got my shirt all wet.

"I wouldn't like it, but-"

"Drop it Emmett. No buts." I informed him.

Still holding Jasper, I sought out Carlisle since I didn't have much of a clue of what the boys would wear out of their huge choice of clothes.

He was sitting on his bed; terrible rappish metalish music blaring out of an iPod I had no clue he had. He glanced at me when I walked into his room.

"What do you want?" he asked.

"I need you to pack Em and Jasper's suitcases. You're a boy and I'm not. So please, while I get Alice ready. Please, Carlisle. " I pleaded with him.

"Not without me getting something in return."

"What do you want? 10 bucks?"

"20."

"Deal. But you better do it well." I pulled a twenty dollar bill out of my pocket and handed it to him. He went off happily waving his money.

I sighed. Kids these days. Only cared about money.

I went up to supervise Carlisle a little while later. "All done!" he said cheerily. Then he remembered he was supposed to be acting bored out of his skull and be cool.

"Like, whatever dudes. Got my money."

"OK!" I called. "EVERYBODY GET DOWN HERE! WE'RE GOING TO THE AIRPORT!"

I thought of how we were going to get there and dashed to the phone book. I ran my finger down a page. "Taxi, Taxi, Limo!"

I called the limo company and asked them to pick us up and please hurry. At the last minute I told them to bring 4 car seats. "No, wait, 5." Jasper was almost as mini as Alice.

I gathered all the kid's stuff and put it on the front porch. I ran up the stairs; I had forgotten about the babies!

I almost collided with Esme on the stairs. I sighed in relief. She was carrying Bella and Edward and Rose was on her shoulders.

"Thanks, Esme. You're a huge help."

She handed me Rosie and I realized this was the first times I had carried one of the real little kids.

Honk, Honk. I glanced out the window. The limo was here.

"EMMETT! JASPER! GET DOWN! We have to go!"

After 2 minutes I got fed up and ran upstairs.

"Emmett, Jasper, I swear-" I stopped as I saw Jasper yet again crying and Emmett looking triumphant.

"Emmett! What have you done?"

I scooped up Jasper and tried to comfort him. "What did he do to you, sweetie?"

"He-he-was t-t-t-teasing me cuz I'm so so small and so I said n-no I'm not and he said yeah and I said no and he said yeah and then he started walking and he pushed me and my head got hitted on the hard floor!" this brought on a new round of tears.

"Emmett, do you have no respect for your little brother? I'm going to do something about this back at the Fork's house, I will. I hear another peep out of you and you're going to get it. Got it?"

He looked up at me. "Peep!" he whispered.

I glared at him and walked out. "Whatever, Emmett, we're leaving and I bet you wouldn't want to be hear all alone!"

"No!" he shouted and rushed past me.

I took Jasper downstairs and found Esme loading Alice and Bella. Rosie was toddling around trying to escape Esme and Edward was half-toddling half-crawling. He would start walking, fall down, crawl for a 30 seconds then do it again.

I brought Jasper over and put him in one of the car seats. Then I set out catching Rose and Edward. I pretended like Rose was going too fast and I couldn't catch her, when I reality she was going about 1 mile per hour. I grabbed her and threw her up in the air. She giggled. I handed her to Esme.

I crawled on the ground toward Edward, pretending he was just so hard to get. Then, as I was nearing him, he saw me, stood up and shot off. With his usual vampire speed. I stood shocked. I shrieked. Esme swished over.

"WHERE IS HE? WHERE IS MY LITTLE BROTHER?" she screamed. The limo driver, oblivious to this point, rolled down the window and poked his head out. "Hey, lady, can you not scream? I'm trying to listen to the game here!"

I looked at Esme. "He's not your little brother. He's your son."

"What? Look, all I know is that all these kids are my little brothers and sisters. And I just like, know you're somehow my granddaughter. Okay?"

I nodded hesitantly. "Okay…Watch the others please, k? I'll go get your, um, little brother."

She nodded, on the verge of tears.

I ran through the forest until I found his scent. I glided over to him, and tripped over a rock. I was never clumsy. But my eyes were locked on him. Little 2-year-old looking Edward, my dad, was sitting over a deer. His teeth were latched onto its neck.

He looked up at me sheepishly.

"Sowwy, Sowwy, Me sowwy! Me fisty! Me no know happen! Me go fast! " he burst out

in tears.

"Don't worry, please, it's okay. That's what you used to do, okay? Are you all better now?" He nodded and sloppily wiped away his tears.

"This is going to be fun, okay?"

I hoisted him onto my back and started running back to the limo.

He screamed.

'EDWARD! OH MY SWEET, SWEET, ADORABLE LITTLE BROTHER!" Esme cried out. I handed him to her.

"Get in everyone! Last call!" I shouted. Everyone jumped in and I made sure the front door of the house was locked. Then I got in.

"Airport, please," I said to the driver.

And off we went.

**That was not really my fave chapter, I was going to start it off in the Fork's house, but then I realized I would've skipped over tons of stuff. And next chapter……AIRPLANE!!! Lolllll!**

**Thanks to all the people that reviewed/favorited/alerted etc.**

**LUV Ya!!!**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 of Kid Problems

**Thanks for anyone that reviewed! By the way, I have pictures of the kids in my profile!**

RenPOV

"Thanks." I said half heartedly to the driver and tossed a wad of some amount of money into his lap. Of course, no matter how much it was he didn't deserve it. _Shushing_ us the whole time. I looked back on the limo ride.

"_Nessie, Rosie bowed." Rosalie spoke for the first time I'd heard. _

"_SHHHHHH! Hello? The GAME'S ONE!" The driver told us. Then, as if he thought I couldn't hear, he said "some people have no respect for baseball. It's saddening."_

_I snorted._

Alice started to whimper as she saw the huge, towering Alaska International Airport. {I have no clue what it really is called.) "Nessie, whaddif Ally gets lost?"

"You won't, if you stay by me." I said. She pressed against me and slid her hand in mine.

We walked inside.

Esme spoke up. "Renesmee, shouldn't we each get a couple kids to lead or whatever so they don't get lost?"

"Sure." I said. "That's a great idea. I'll take Alice, Rose, Jasper and Emmett. You can take Edward and Bella. Carlisle, can I trust you to stay by all of us and make sure nobody gets lost?"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever."

An airport guy walked by. I got an idea. "Excuse me sir, but do you guys have strollers?"

"Over by the escalator."

"Oh! Thanks! Esme, stay here."

I ran off in the direction of the strollers. They looked decent. I grabbed one with 2 seats and one with 3 seats. I easily dragged them over to everybody.

Esme grabbed one of them and put Edward and Bella in. I looked at my group of kids. "Okay, so Rose automatically gets a seat." I lifted her in the front seat. Next. Alice was six, but the size of a small 4 year old. Real tiny. "Alice, you're next." I lifted her in.

"Jasper, I know you're seven, and a big boy and whatnot, but I can't push this stroller and hold your and Emmett's hands at the same time. "Hey! Who said I needed my hand held?" cried Emmett. "Me." I said. "Maybe if you had proved yourself more mature before, I would have let you, but you might run off to God knows where."

"Anyway, please Jasper? For me?" _Nobody would notice him in anyway. All these kids were super small except for Em and Carlisle. Jasper looks like a 5 year old, no offense to him. _I added in my head.

He nodded. "Cool!" I said. "Anyway Jasper, it's so much fun! You don't have to walk at all! I just push you!" I put him in the back seat.

"You ready, Esme?" she nodded. I grabbed Emmett's hand, and he scowled.

"Okay," I said. "Our flight's at 11 and it's 9 now. So let's get going."

We walked up to the desk. "Cullen" I said to the woman. She did some tapping on her computer. "Okay, you're heading to Forks, Washington?" She looked up at me and I nodded. "ID?"

I pulled out my semi-fake ID and handed it to her. She scanned it and handed it back to me. We gave her our luggage and watched it roll down the belt.

**(I'm skipping everything like security because I'm too lazy to write it all down.) **

**AT GATE 9A:**

"All aboard first class of flight 913, to Forks, Washington!" the woman on the intercom called out. "Also, will Bill Smith and Amy Doe come to the front desk please?" **(they do that all the time at the airport, LOL)**

"That's us!" I jumped up. I surveyed my family. We got in the line and waited patiently until we got to the little electronic ticket thing. I handed the woman my ticket, she ripped half of it off and gave it back to me. "Go ahead." She said very bored. She did the same to all my companions.

We all rolled down the long boardwalk with Rose and Alice looking down anxiously. Finally, though, we got to the meeting place of the boardwalk and plane. The man standing there helped us take the kids out of the strollers, as we had to leave them there. "Ma'am," he said. "Why aren't you wearing your unaccompanied minor tag?"

"Because, sir, I am nineteen." I lied. "And these are my brothers and sisters. Our parents are waiting for us in Forks."

He laughed nervously. "Of course, heh heh heh."

"Come on everybody." I said, ignoring the guy.

We boarded the plane.

**I know I said this would be the airplane scene, and I'm sorry!!! SO SORRY!!!**

**I PROMISE PROMISE PROMISE the next chapter will be ALL airplane!!!**

**ANYHOO: reviews+me= :D **


	6. Chapter 6

**I'm real sorry I haven't updated in a while!!!!! I've been caught up w/ everything!!!! But here's the airplane scene! By the way, Alice is carrying around this giant stuffed bunny through the airport. I forgot to mention that. **

Part One of Airplane scene.

Chapter 6

ALICE POV (heh, a 6 year old's pov)

We walked through a door and on a long hallway thing. We walked for hours and hours and hours till we got to the end. **(She exaggerates).** I screamed when we got to the end cause when I looked down I saw all the way to the bottom! There was a little hole thing and I started crying because it was so scary. I grabbed my big sister Nessie's arm and wouldn't let go. (**They all think Nessie is their sister except for Esme. Esme keeps getting this weird feeling that Ness is her granddaughter, in case you're kind of confused, but anyway now Esme is just putting her off as her sister. Okay now I'm confusing myself….) **

"Alice, please, we have to get on the plane and we can't if you're clinging on to me. So can you let go of me please?" Nessie asked me. I nodded but stayed right behind her.

We all walked down the long row thing in the middle of the big silver box. We walked through a blue curtain and saw a bunch of huge chairs. Nessie started telling everybody where to sit.

"OMG! Don't tell me you got us first class all to ourselves!?!?!!?!?!?!?" My big sister Esme said.

Ness nodded.

Esme picked me up and swirled me around. I giggled.

"Alice, you're going to sit right next to Jasper. Emmett, you're sitting right next to ME." Nessie told my brother Emmy. "Jasper, you can get the window seat or aisle."

"Window!" he shouted.

"Now, the babies. Bella goes next to me since she's the littlest, and Edward and Rose go next to Esme. Now, Al, Jasper, you're going to have a seat in between you to put stuff in. And Carlisle! You can sit anywhere, actually, in first class. Alright? Now everybody go sit. And please, please, let's try to make this a good trip." Nessie fell down in her chair real tired.

I bounced up and down and skipped to my favorite brother Jasper. He was already sitting by the window. I sat in the end seat and put my huge bunny rabbit Mr. Bunny in the middle seat. I tried to buckle him in but it didn't work. I sniffed.

"Jaspy, I can't get Mista Bunny buckled up! You do wit!"

He groaned but buckled him in. I smiled at him. "Fanks, Jaspy!" I put my arm around Mr. B. I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

Ness POV

I glanced over at Alice. She was fast asleep, her arms wrapped around a huge bunny. Jasper was fighting sleep.

Emmett was playing with a Nintendo DS I had no clue he had.

Bella of course was knocked out.

Esme was half asleep; a dreamy smile on her beautiful face.

Rose was staring out the window.

Edward was tracing circles on the armrest.

And I was watching my family.

Something felt wrong.

I got a sinking feeling in my stomach.

Oh, no.

Carlisle.

Where is he?

I jumped out of my chair and ran through the curtain. I almost let out a shriek but clamped my hand over my mouth.

A small, stream of blood a human couldn't see was streaming out of the bathroom. It said it was unoccupied. Slowly, I twisted the doorknob and opened the door.

Carlisle was sitting there, licking his lips, a drained human man lying on the floor.

I just about fainted.

**Haha! So, a cookie for anyone that figures out the pattern!**


	7. Chapter 7

**I'm REALLY sorry about how I haven't been updating, I'm just really caught up w/ my newest story Coming Back.**

**But anyway, enjoy this chapter.**

NessPOV

"C-Carlisle?" I stuttered.

He very slowly lifted up his head. His now crimson eyes bored into mine.

I was frozen to my spot. I was dizzy with questions. What to do with this dead human? Or Carlisle? And what about the other kids? Are they going to keep on drinking anything's blood, one by one?

I finally came back to Earth. Carlisle looked ashamed; he was sitting on the floor, his head hanging.

Realization stung me as I grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the bathroom. Nobody saw.

"Go sit down. Keep your head down and Do. Not. Let. Anyone. See. Your. Eyes. Don't talk to your siblings, sit down and look down. Got it?" I growled.

He nodded and took off.

I sighed. I didn't want to be mean to him; but it was necessary. I walked back into the bathroom and looked at the mess.

I sighed again.

I considered doing something else to the human to make it look like he committed suicide, but I decided against it.

I spotted a window in the corner. I looked back to the man. He would fit.

I wrenched open the window and was hit with a blast of air. I picked up the man, took a deep breath and carefully pushed him out. I watched him falling into the water. "Sorry." I whispered to nobody.

I closed the window and slid down the wall, breathing heavily. I started sobbing when my mind learned what I had just done.

Tears still streaming down my face, I cleaned up the blood on the floor. When that was done, I looked in the mirror and tried to compose myself.

When I was breathing normally and my eyes were less red I walked out the door. There was a line of a fat guy and an impatient looking woman in a business suit. She was just starting to walk away when I came out. I blushed and strode toward my seat.

My little "sisters and brothers" were staring expectantly at me, except Carlisle.

I sat down in my seat and rolled my head away from the aisle.

I vaguely remember saying "Esme, watch em please." Before falling asleep.

**Sorry, not my best chapter!!!!!**


	8. Chapter 8

Chap 8 of Kid Problems

**Okay, this is a really short chapter and a funny one (I hope). I know I've REALLY slowed down with the updates for my stories!! But summer's almost here and UNFORTUNATELY I'm going to California(YUCK) for the 2****nd**** time this year and I probably will get a few chapters done. But you seriously do not realize how much I hate CA. I hate it!! HATE IT!!!!!**

**Anyway, this is a break from all the sad stuff.**

**YAY!**

**Chap 8:**

Random Sailor on a Random Boat in the Ocean Whose Name is Leroy's POV:

I was sweeping the deck of my father's ship, _The Pink Bubblegum_, when I hear a hiss of air somewhere above me.

"Leroy, watch out!" My 18 year old brother Blade shouted.

I looked up and shielded my eyes against the blinding sun. "Egad!" I screamed, for a human body was falling my way.

I fainted on the spot. "Eek!" My sister Sparkle shrieked.

When I woke up a few seconds later, I found a bloody man lying on top of me, dead.

"Yuck," I said.

**Heh, heh. Yeah, kind of an epilogue to the last chapter, haha.**

**Try to update soon!!!**


	9. Very Important

I am so tremendously sorry. Please don't think I've forgotten about you guys! I love all my readers and will definitely finish my stories. I will be doing some tinkering with Let's Focus on the Future and a major overhaul on Kid Problems. I won't change anything too important, though. Just fixing it up and yadda yadda yadda.

Thank you so much for putting up with me.

Chapter one LFOTF revision will be up within the week, and KP within the month.

Thanks so much!

AtCat101


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